Yesterday had nothing to do with me, yet it was a very, very important day to me. Even though it’s got nothing to do with me, it has to do with people, one especially, that I love and care about. Trans folk are under attack, and trans kids are under especially heavy fire. The rhetoric used against children has become downright vitriolic. I am lucky as hell to have understanding and forgiving friends and family who have guided an amiable, ignorant shithead into a woke shithead.

Yesterday was Transgender Day of Visibility.

It is a very important day.

A few years ago, Laverne Cox changed my life in 60 seconds and prepared me for a future I didn’t know I’d have. I will always remember the night she spoke at the Allies Dinner for Equality Utah. It fucked me up, broke me down, and fixed a part of me I didn’t know was broken.

She didn’t give me empathy, because that’s impossible. I’m a middle class, white, CIS man. We have no shared experience. She didn’t give me sympathy, because it’s not a strong enough word. She made me care, deeply, for something I erroneously thought I already cared enough about, but I honestly had no earthly idea. She was masterful.

I can hear you … hell, I can hear myself: The Transgender Day of Visibility, so, let me talk about me for a moment. It’s because I cannot pretend to understand how to speak for someone else, especially a transgender person. So, how about some information?

From a 2019 report from HRC:

Harrowing statistics from a study recently published by the American Academy of Pediatrics revealed alarming levels of attempted suicide among transgender youth — with the highest rates among transgender boys and non-binary youth. The findings emphasize the urgency of building welcoming and safe communities for LGBTQ young people, particularly for transgender youth.

And, in the years since? It hasn’t gotten better, it’s gotten much, much worse. Shitty adults have gone on an massive offensive to attack trans people and their shitty kids are joining in to a chorus of anti-trans messaging.

More than half of transgender male teens who participated in the survey reported attempting suicide in their lifetime, while 29.9 percent of transgender female teens said they attempted suicide. Among non-binary youth, 41.8 percent of respondents stated that they had attempted suicide at some point in their lives.

Many transgender young people experience family rejection, bullying and harassment, or feel unsafe for simply being who they are – all of which can be added risk factors for suicide.

This year, many state governments decided that the lives of trans kids weren’t worth saving and mounted attack after attack. In Utah, we had HB11 Student Eligibility in Interscholastic Activities and HB0127 Medical Practice Amendments. The first bill a shitshow of hate that caused Republicans to froth at the mouth as they waited their turns to demonize at risk kids. The second, a more nefarious bill mirroring bills we’re seeing in other states that blocks access to gender affirming health care that has been shown, conclusively, to save lives.

Republicans want to block access to life saving health care and they do not care who they kill to do it. Republicans are school yard bullies all grown up.

Don’t, not for one moment, tell me about Utah’s Governor and the four – FOUR – Republican legislators who think that transgender kids lives have value. They are a statistical blip, and, as I’ve screamed for years, we have to stop throwing trophies at people who do the right thing from time to time. Just because the weight of dead children was too much to bear for FIVE TOTAL REPUBLICANS isn’t a cause to celebrate. It’s a glaring panic attack caused by Republican bigotry, ignorance, and hate.

Yes, I know this is an unpopular position to take, that these five lawmakers did something “brave” and “compassionate” but it was just five guys with hundreds of shitty friends who keep hanging out with their shitty friends after their shitty friends do shitty things. Spare me.

Deep breath.

Hold it 20 seconds …

I have no idea where to take this. I’m angry and I’ve got nothing and no one to punch. Ignorant fuckwits are attacking my kid, his friends, their friends and their families and thousands of people I’ve never met that deserve to live lives free from the hate of the small minded. Free to find themselves and live their best lives. Free, you know, like Americans should be.